It's Friday, August 15, 2025
Democrats have many flaws, but you have to admire the passion they exhibit when one of their core values is threatened. They mobilized with unwavering resolve this week after Donald Trump sought to impose his extreme, far-right agenda by cracking down on crime in the nation's capital. Doing what comes naturally, the Democratic Party mounted a stirring defense of crime and the criminals who commit it, armed with the most compelling arguments in their rhetorical arsenal.
"No, you're wrong. Shut up." A Democratic staple because it's maximally condescending and works in any context: The border is secure. The economy is stronger than ever. Joe Biden is as sharp as a tack. Kamala Harris is competent and relatable. Democrats assured us that Trump's crackdown was unnecessary because crime in D.C. was totally under control, citing statistics provided by local officials. In fact, there is ample reason to doubt the reliability of these figures. If you need real evidence that crime is out of control, consider the fact even some journalists are calling bullshit on the Democrats' nothing-to-see-here routine.
"My rich neighborhood is very safe." Muriel Bowser, the city's black, female mayor who fled to Martha's Vineyard in a textbook display of Democratic leadership under pressure, has called for more police officers to keep D.C. safer. Symone Sanders, the Democratic operative turned MSNBC host, disagreed. "I'm a black woman in America," she explained. (Her husband is a lobbyist for D.C. restaurants who has publicly argued that violent crime is driving businesses out of the city.) Sanders went on to note that it doesn't "feel unsafe" to "walk down the streets of Georgetown," a posh neighborhood that is one of the wealthiest on Earth (and doesn't have a Metro station due to crime concerns). Her soaring conclusion—"We have to rethink what safety means in America"—should be utilized by every Democrat eager to allay voter concerns about crime.
"Trump is racist! Aack!" Low-hanging fruit for Democrats. The city has a large black population. The mayor is black. Connect the dots. Crime is a symptom of systemic racism, and so on. Do they care the city's black residents are far more concerned about crime than the mostly white, liberal professionals who can afford to live in safer neighborhoods? That black residents are far more likely to be the victims of criminal activity? Of course not. Earlier this year, a Washington Post poll found 65 percent of the Symone Sanders demographic (black women) said crime in D.C. was a very or extremely serious issue. It might have something to do with the fact that, unlike Sanders, these black women did not get married in a Gilded Age mansion.
"What about climate change?" MSNBC's Joe Scarborough, who was interviewing Sanders when she urged her fellow black women to reimagine the meaning of safety, tried his best this week to stop his liberal guests from sounding like coddled elites who think armed carjackings and tweaking subway masturbators are just a charming slice of urban authenticity. He failed, obviously. "When I go to D.C., I'm not afraid of losing my wallet," MSNBC contributor Anand Giridharadas told him with a straight face (and ridiculous coif). "I'm afraid that my children's freedom to breathe will be stolen in a world where climate change policy is non-existent."
"Look at this chart, dumbass." This one often goes hand-in-hand with "Shut up, you're wrong," but it doesn't always have the intended effect. Liberal activist Judd Legum attempted a snarky retort by asking if Trump would also be sending federal authorities to crack down on crime in Tulsa, Oklahoma, which has a slightly higher violent crime rate than D.C. based on a chart he made. Sick burn, but Tulsa's mayor is also a black Democrat, so fighting crime there would be just as racist. Then we noticed something else about his stupid list of cities plagued by violent crime, which pairs nicely with Al Sharpton's suggestion that Trump would be less racist if he targeted a "Republican city."
Crucial context: While liberals were protesting Trump's anti-crime agenda earlier this week, a man was shot and killed several blocks away, marking the city's 100th homicide this year. In 2023, police narrowly thwarted an attempted carjacking within sight of another protest against Congress's efforts to overturn a D.C. "crime reform" bill that dramatically reduced sentencing guidelines for carjacking, burglary, and illegal gun possession. The Washington Post reports Sean Charles Dunn, the white guy arrested after throwing his Subway sandwich at a federal law enforcement officer while screaming about fascism, has become a “hero” to many residents.
By the numbers: Notwithstanding the persuasiveness of Democratic messaging about reimagining safety and prioritizing climate justice, the Republican position—crime is bad—polls better with actual voters. "Donald Trump is like Air Jordan towering over Joe Biden when it comes to their handling of crime," CNN pollster Harry Enten explained this week. Trump's net approval rating on crime is 27 points higher than Biden's in 2024, while the Republican Party holds a 16-point advantage over Democrats on the issue. Imagine that.
Related: Politico published an article this week lamenting Trump's "punishment-heavy plan" to crack down on Mexican drug cartels, which suggests deporting illegal immigrants is bad because it creates "a pool of new recruits" for violent drug gangs. Much safer to keep them here and encourage them to transition to more sustainable methods of transnational drug smuggling.
Ladies and gentlemen, the Democrats: Coddling violent criminals isn't the only item on the Democratic Party's agenda heading into the 2026 midterms. They're also cursing a lot and promising to protect illegal immigrants from deportation at all costs—even if it means breaking the law.
"Fuck the rules, we are going to win. Whatever it takes," said Robert Francis "Beto" O'Rourke, a distinguished expert when it comes to losing by conventional means. The obnoxious, thrice-failed candidate, once heralded as the "Kennedyesque" savior of the Democratic Party, has become a marquee name in the latest iteration of anti-Trump grievance theater. After seizing power through any means necessary, Beto wants Democrats to "drive that car like we stole it" and immediately enact sweeping protections for the illegal immigrants that "make this country so goddamn great."
What they're saying: "We will continue to call out the terrorist organization that is ICE," Rep. Delia Ramirez (D., Ill.) told a gathering of liberal activists this week. She has also accused Trump of being a "pedophile."
READ MORE: The Emerging Democratic Consensus for 2026
Racial LARPers unite, bury hatchet: Zohran Mamdani, the radical socialist, trust fund kid running for mayor of New York, wants to prevent ICE from operating in the city, and has bragged that securing taxpayer-funded benefits for illegal immigrants was one of his "greatest victories" as a state legislator. Getting accepted into Bowdoin College, a mid-tier Division III lacrosse school, was another personal victory for Mamdani. He falsely identified himself as "Black or African American" on his Columbia University application and still got rejected, even though his father is a professor at the Ivy League school. So it's fitting that he filmed a campaign video this week with Elizabeth Warren, who made history as the "first woman of color" on the Harvard Law School faculty.
Jussie Smollett returns, won't stop until he finds the real racists: The disgraced actor who faked a hate crime against himself in 2019 is trying to revive his career, but still won't accept responsibility for his actions. Say what you will about Elizabeth Warren, at least she (sort of) apologized for pretending to be Native American. In an interview with Variety published this week, Smollett once again denied paying a couple of buff Nigerians to stage a hate crime outside his apartment, and insinuated that former Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel orchestrated the attack to divert attention from a racially charged police scandal.
"I'm not an investigative reporter or a detective," Smollett said via Zoom from London, where he is recording an album. "I can't sit and tell you exactly, beat by beat, what happened. I can only tell you what did not happen. And what did not happen is the story that's been out there for almost seven years, that somehow I would have even a reason to do something as egregious as this." (It definitely did happen.)
Make cheerleaders female again: The Minnesota Vikings unveiled the "next generation" of its cheerleading squad, which includes a couple of giddy, twerking males whose flamboyant dance moves rival those of the state's governor, "Tampon Tim" Walz. We can't say we're surprised this happened on his watch. If you can find a gambling establishment that will give you decent odds on Walz to make an appearance on the Vikings' sideline and prance around like a free-spirited knucklehead, we'd take that bet.
Email: stiles@freebeacon.com
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Looking for a racist, Jussie? Look inside yourself.
Andrew, thanks for starting off my Friday with that tour de force of humor!