Bring Back Internment Camps (for Gen Z)

Plus: a Jewish plot prevails in Kentucky, Colbert's last show, and Barney Frank's protruding nipples

IT’S FRIDAY, MAY 22, 2026

Let’s get straight to the point. No bullshit.

America is deeply polarized, but we can all agree on one thing: Gen Z is out of control. We need a complete and total shutdown of their participation in society until our country’s representatives can figure out what the hell is going on. In other words, we need a serious national dialogue about bringing back internment camps. Not the race-based kind that Democrats prefer. These would be inclusive, empathetic, educational.

It’s for their own good. Take away their dopamine boxes. Teach them how to read a book, how to socialize, how to flirt, and (if necessary) how to have sex without crying. Practice showing up on time. Learn what “out of pocket” means. Force them to cook their own meals, for crying out loud. Taylor Lorenz, the preeminent Gen Z intellectual (despite being at least 41 years old), offered a characteristically deranged defense of young people who spend way too much money on restaurants and delivery apps.

“This is [because] they do not have the time or capacity to create home cooked meals,” wrote Lorenz, who went viral in 2018 for complaining about the $22 avocado toast she ordered on a delivery app. Thanks to capitalism, she continued, young people are “forced to rely on these services.”

She makes it sound like being Gen Z is a form of disability that requires a state-sanctioned remedy—and we couldn’t agree more. That’s why the internment camps would have humane reeducation programs for morons who insist that DoorDash is a human right.

Think of all the lives we could save. In case you hadn’t noticed, Gen Z love to commit and defend acts of violence against their perceived enemies. Briahna Joy Gray, another 40-something Gen Z apologist, argued that delivery apps were involved in a conspiracy to prosecute Luigi Mangione, 28, for murdering UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson.

Relatedly, more than 40 percent of Gen Z voters view Mangione’s (alleged) actions as “somewhat acceptable.” That includes the credentialed “journalists” of the New York City press corps who showed up outside a Manhattan courthouse this week to report on the case remind Thompson’s children that they are “better off without him.”

Our British comrades recently approved a lifelong ban on buying cigarettes for everyone born after 2008. It’s a dumb idea, obviously, but the model is sound. We could start by rounding up everyone born after 1992. If you had a smartphone before you turned 18, get on the bus. This will include some younger Millennials, but no one is going to miss them either.

Shelby Campbell, for example. She’s a 32-year-old single mom and self-described “c—t” who constantly posts videos of herself “twerking” on social media. She is running for Congress in Michigan (as a Democrat, obviously). Straight to the camps. Same goes for Zohran Mamdani and his terrorist-supporting wife. Hasan Piker, Nick Fuentes, the guy who tried to shoot up the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. Even Sydney Sweeney. Sorry, no exceptions.

Is it harsh? Maybe. One could even argue that the youngsters aren’t entirely to blame for their inability to function in society. They didn’t always ask to be coddled. In many cases, it was the so-called adults who engineered said coddling in the name of social justice. This week, for example, Harvard faculty finally did something sensible by voting to cap the number of A grades given to undergraduates at 20 percent. Last year the share was almost 70 percent, up from 30 percent in 2013.

Naturally, students hated the idea, citing concerns for their “mental health” and complaining that “student voices have not been centered.” They’re just doing what they’ve been taught to do in these situations, which is why everyone involved in higher education over the past several decades should also be sent to the camps to look upon the monsters they’ve created and despair.

EVEN FILTHY HIPPIES HATE TAXES

Several states held primary elections this week. Rep. Thomas Massie (R., Ky.) lost his primary, which was kind of a good-news, bad-news situation for Tucker Carlson and the other antisemitic influencers backing his campaign. It was bad in the sense that they wanted him to stay in Congress to combat the global Jewish conspiracy, but good in the sense that his defeat proved them right about the meddling Jews.

One has to wonder if they’ll ever realize the futility of taking on a nefarious cabal of shape-shifters who can control the weather with the push of a button. Massie, who won’t be missed, will soon join Marjorie Taylor Greene on the neo-Nazi, pro-Hamas podcast circuit—and, soon enough, the ash heap of history.

One of the most amusing results came in Oregon, where 83 percent of voters rejected a ballot measure to raise the gasoline tax, double the payroll tax, and jack up car-related fees. Even residents of Portland, one of the country’s premier havens for dirtbag leftists, opposed the measure by a 74-26 percent margin.

This might seem obvious, but if you keep voting for Democrats, you should not be surprised or upset when they start raising your taxes. Few things are more predictable. They’ll use the money to pay for stuff that doesn’t work and then blame “lack of funding” to justify more tax hikes—and on and on.

These are the same voters who elected the Democratic governor and State Legislature that enacted the new taxes as a “temporary” measure in 2025. They only got a chance to vote it down because a Republican lawmaker collected enough signatures to force a referendum. Of course, most Democratic voters don’t oppose higher taxes in theory, they just want someone else to pay them.

Fun fact: In 2020, Oregon voters approved a ballot measure to decriminalize all drugs in the name of social justice. State lawmakers abandoned the plan four years later amid a spike in overdose deaths and public disorder. Who could have predicted?

GOOD RIDDANCE / GOOD REST

Stephen Colbert is officially off the air. By the time you read this, he’ll have hosted his final episode of The Late Show on CBS—a show that hasn’t been profitable (or funny) in years. Liberal elites and other sanctimonious cranks will mourn Colbert’s departure because, according to their educated worldview, all white men have a God-given right to earn $15 million to go on television and say things they agree with.

“He’s radiated gratitude,” CNN’s Brian Stelter said of Colbert during an appearance at the Workplace Innovation Summit, sponsored by Fortune magazine. “We need those kinds of role models.”

As is often the case when professional journalists opine, the word “we” is doing a lot of work there. To the extent that someone so irrelevant can be divisive, Colbert was a divisive figure. His purpose was not so much to entertain, but rather to soothe the fragile psyches of his target audience—a tiny sliver of the population that just so happens to correlate strongly with mental illness.

Whereas his late-night predecessors might have pandered to the vast majority of Americans who don’t follow politics obsessively and would rather not watch an Elizabeth Warren interview at midnight, Colbert didn’t even try. Whereas genuine comedians would consider all politicians deserving of ridicule, Colbert never wavered in his partisan hackery, even when our country was led by a bumbling zombie who “finally beat Medicare.”

Despite being “canceled” for having the “courage” to denounce half the country for electing an evil scumbag, Colbert has already lined up his next gig—cowriting a new film in the Lord of the Rings franchise.

Good riddance, dorkwad.

Barney Frank died this week at the age of 86. The former Democratic congressman was widely loathed by Republicans during his time in office (1981-2013), but he may soon be remembered as one of the last sane members of his party—just as Democrats have developed a “strange new respect” for George W. Bush and Dick Cheney in recent years.

Frank spent his final days railing against the radical left-wing activists who have pressured Democrats to embrace “very drastic social reconstructions that go beyond the politically acceptable.” He said he was “troubled” by the party’s embrace of Graham Platner, the Nazi-adjacent furniture scion running for U.S. Senate in Maine. Good for him, but it doesn’t seem like Democrats are eager to take his advice.

He was also a commensurate slob. The only memorable passage of Elizabeth Warren’s long-forgotten 2016 memoir, A Fighting Chance, is the part where she describes meeting Frank for the first time at his apartment. “It was a small space; on one side of the living area there was a king-size mattress on the floor, complete with a tangle of unmade sheets and blankets,” she recalled.

Frank was also the subject of an early Twitter banger courtesy of Donald Trump, which in retrospect should have made his political rise feel slightly more inevitable than it did at the time. “Barney Frank looked disgusting—nipples protruding—in his blue shirt before Congress,” our current president wrote in 2011. “Very very disrespectful.”

Rest in peace, you gay bastard.

PALATE CLEANSER

Almost 15 years later, Trump remains—and always will be—one of the funniest politicians in American history. His son, Don Jr., is getting married this weekend, but Trump told reporters this week that he doesn’t think he’ll be able to attend. “You know, this is not good timing for me,” he said in the Oval Office. “I have a thing called Iran and other things.”

Trump did have some kind words for his son, whom he described as “a person who I’ve known for a long time.”

Crucial context: Don Jr. is marrying Bettina Anderson, a banking heiress, model, and socialite. She is almost 20 years younger—and considerably more attractive—than his ex-fiancée Kimberly Guilfoyle. Most crucially, Anderson was never married to Gavin Newsom. Don Jr. won a Washington Free Beacon Man of the Year award in 2024 for not only upgrading his relationship but also for persuading his father to ship Guilfoyle out of the country by making her ambassador to Greece.

Well played, sir! We’re still proud of you, even if your father isn’t.

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND

X: @AndrewStilesUSA

Email: stiles@freebeacon.com

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