AOC Has Weird Legs

Plus: Highlights from the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show

It’s Friday, October 17, 2025

A belated happy Columbus Day to all who celebrate, even the haters and losers. Democrats sought to burnish their woke credentials by preaching about “Indigenous Peoples’ Day.” The official X account for House Democrats posted a picture of a bison. Gov. Tim Walz (D., Minn.) attended a Native American ceremony “on the shore of Bde Maka Ska.” Rep. Ayanna Pressley (D., Mass.) declared, “We are all on stolen land.” Alas, the esteemed congresswoman declined to set a timetable for vacating her $1.1 million-vacation home on Martha’s Vineyard, or “Noepe,” as the island is known by its rightful owners, the Wampanoag Tribe of Gay Head.

Some Democrats weren’t so keen to acknowledge the made-up holiday. Barack Obama, the failed president who “owns” a $19-million waterfront mansion on stolen Wampanoag land, declined to comment. Elizabeth Warren, the Pow Wow Chow cookbook contributor who made history as the “first woman of color” on the Harvard Law School faculty, was also eerily silent. It could have something to do with the fact that Warren, sometimes referred to as “Pocahontas,” advanced her career by falsely identifying as Native American her entire life before running for president in 2020. If anyone exists on “stolen land,” it’s Warren—the fake Indian white lady who amassed a fortune by exploiting affirmative action. She lives in a $4-million Victorian mansion near the Harvard campus, founded on the ancestral lands of the Massachusett.

A date with destiny: President Donald Trump posthumously awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Charlie Kirk on what would have been his 32nd birthday. He was born on Oct. 14. Amazingly enough, so was George Floyd. So was Dwight Eisenhower. So too were E. E. Cummings, the African dictator Mobutu Sese Seko Kuku Ngbendu wa Za Banga, and Shaggy 2 Dope, cofounder of the horrorcore hip-hop duo Insane Clown Posse.

What does it mean? We might never know the answer. Maybe it’s just a coincidence, or maybe it’s something more profound. There’s plenty of evidence to suggest a broader significance. Chuck Yeager broke the sound barrier on Oct. 14, 1947. An American U-2 spy plane captured photographic evidence of Soviet missiles on Cuba during a reconnaissance flight on Oct. 14, 1962. Martin Luther King Jr. won the Nobel Peace Prize on Oct. 14, 1964. Exactly 20 years later, Detroit Lions quarterback Jared Goff was born in San Rafael, Calif., the small Bay Area town that is also the birthplace of novelist Philip K. Dick, Metallica frontman James Hetfield, and guitar legend Carlos Santana. Goff is married to former Sports Illustrated model Christen Harper, who was featured in a previous edition of this newsletter.

By the numbers: The Goffs were married on June 22, 2024.

• June = 6

• 2+2 = 4

• 6 + 4 = 10

• 10 = October

• 20 - (2+4) = 14

Photographic analysis: Christen Harper Goff.

Highlights from the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show: Thank you, President Trump. The iconic lingerie brand returned to its roots this week by ditching the woke DEI nonsense and showcasing the “unapologetically sexy” aesthetic that people actually want to see. Last year’s show, under the oppressive Joe Biden regime, was panned as a “Boring Parade of Wokery” for featuring a bunch of morbidly obese and transgender “models.” This year’s version was better.

Crucial context: Victoria’s Secret is owned by Les Wexner, a Jeb Bush donor who left the Republican Party in 2018 after watching Barack Obama give a speech. He is best known for his financial ties to jet-setting pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, the Democratic donor and longtime pal of former president Bill Clinton.

Alessandra Ambrosio, the seasoned Victoria’s Secret model who walked in this year’s fashion show, is 44 years old. Katie Porter, the obnoxious Liz Warren protégé with anger management issues, is 51 years old. This week, Porter suggested there were more videos of her berating staffers that could be released if she continues to run for governor of California. She used every ounce of restraint to stop herself from pistol-whipping the local journalist who asked the question. Who would you rather trust with your children’s future?

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the dimwitted socialist, is 36 years old and conventionally attractive. She’d never make it as a professional model, however, because AOC suffers from what industry insiders might refer to as “salami logs,” or “British legs.” It’s not clear whether the condition would be covered under her nationalized health care plan.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Democrats: Barack Obama praised James Talarico, the woke wanna-be preacher who’s running for U.S. Senate in Texas. The former president thinks the “terrific, talented young man” might have what it takes to finally turn Texas blue in 2026. He doesn’t. Coastal libs said the same thing about Beto O’Rourke in 2018 and look how that turned out. Talarico might have a better shot if there wasn’t footage of him declaring that “God is non-binary” and claiming there are “six” biological sexes.

Obama’s former goon, Ben “Hamas” Rhodes, urged his followers to support the U.S. Senate candidates in Maine and Michigan who aren’t backed by the party establishment. He was referring to Graham Platner, the Maine Democrat who described himself as a “communist” and denounced “all” cops as bastards in years-old Reddit posts using the handle “P-Hustle.” Platner dismissed the posts, which he deleted before announcing his campaign, as youthful indiscretions. He was 35 years old at the time. In Michigan, Rhodes is presumably backing fellow Hamas supporter Abdul El-Sayed, who sent a fundraising email on Oct. 7 denouncing the anniversary of... Israel’s invasion of Gaza.

“The party has to change to have any chance of standing up to MAGA,” Rhodes said.

Good luck!

Biden declares victory: Former president Joe Biden penned a guest column in the Washington Free Beacon touting the Gaza peace deal as the “Opening Act” of his bold second-term agenda.

Finally, a goony liberal politician on prestige TV: The new season of Slow Horses, the British spy series on Apple TV starring Gary Oldman, features a left-wing politician who is deliberately (and effectively) portrayed as a buffoon. You don’t see that very often, which is annoying because liberalism is ripe for satire—especially the European variety.

Zafar Jaffrey, played by Nick Mohammed, is the mayor of London. The writers could have done what comes naturally to most TV writers and made him a boring “normal” liberal running against the evil right-wing racist. Instead, Jaffrey is far more entertaining as a caricature of woke bullshit. He wants to help voters realize “the dream of a Londerful city.” He defends the “passion” of climate activists and vows to “do better” after his son kills someone in an act of eco-terrorism. “Love and hate are on the ballot this election,” he says at a campaign rally. “Vote love.” Just outside sits a homeless encampment under a campaign billboard: “Vote Jaffrey — Delivering on housing.”

It’s funny because it’s true.

Oh, by the way: The government is still shut down, but all the major newspapers have stopped reporting on it because 1) it’s boring, 2) no one cares, and 3) Democrats are deliberately dragging this out for political theater and no one can credibly claim otherwise. If this wasn’t the case, we’d still be seeing front-page stories about all the sad kids who wanted to dump their dead dog’s ashes in a national park but couldn’t because Republicans wouldn’t let them.

God bless America: Football is back. Trump is president. The government is shut down. Hundreds of journalists are losing their jobs, and Thanksgiving pizza is on sale.

Note: This photo was taken on Oct. 14.

X: @AndrewStilesUSA

Email: stiles@freebeacon.com

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